“Our lives are not determined by what happens to us but how we react to what happens, not by what life brings us but the attitude we bring to life.” – Wade Boggs
Criticisms can pop up anywhere. At some point in your life you’ll be criticized, either personally or professionally, and at times it will be difficult to accept. Most of us react to criticism in one or more wrong ways by instantly defending ourselves or action, go on the offense and attack the critic, go into denial, or shift the blame and point fingers.
Poor reaction to criticisms comes naturally, but sometimes our reaction is worse than the remark itself. When we react we’re on the defensive and our emotion is in control, and we often make irrational decisions when our emotions are in control.
Here’s what you can do instead……… Respond
Responding is a conscious choice, that contains thought and reasoning, and is guided more by logic and less by emotion. When you respond properly to criticism, it loses its power to hurt you.
Initially, criticism is like getting an unexpected bucket of water thrown in your face. But although it’s shocking, there’s nothing life threatening about it. Analyze the remark and determine the “water” or shock; the “sand” or irritant; and the “gold” or truth. This way you can take the criticism and turn it into something good.
Here’s how……..
- Define the “water” – Not all criticism is bad. Decide if it’s gross exaggeration, spite, or downright inaccurate. Also, carefully consider the remark and determine if it’s made by someone qualified and experienced to pass that judgment.
- Define the “sand” – Find what was irritating, or hurtful in the remark. The truth is, if a person has said something negative to you and it’s holding you back, it’s most likely because it resonates with you. Something in their words has struck a chord in you.
- Determine the “gold” – Sometimes what people say has a truth behind their words that can help enlighten you. If the remark struck a chord, it’s your responsibility to find that chord, pull out any truths in the remark and then figure out how to improve that area of your life.
People are always going to criticize you. From your work to your actions to your looks. There are some people who will try to tear you down at every corner because it helps them feel better about themselves. However negative their words may be, hold onto positive and tangible reminders that you are of worth, then use the negativity to fuel for your fire rather than allow it to burn away your confidence.
“How people treat you is their karma; how you react is yours.” – Wayne Dyer
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To Your Success,
Althea
Althea A. McLeish Wilson, RN, MSN
Promoting inner health & outer beauty!
Helping you thrive, not just survive!!
PS. Inner Health & Outer Beauty Store: Health & Wellness with Althea♦
PPS. Did You Find This Helpful? If so, please feel free to share!! Leave a comment or contact me at althea@altheamcleish.com.
